For every action (having a child), there’s an equal and opposite reaction.

As parents we have to take some responsibility for our actions. Because of our decision to have kids we have drastically transformed the world we live in. We cannot spend our lives in denial.

The first step is to admit there is a problem. I, Cheron, accept my part for…

Target’s boost in sales

Yes. Yes. We love Target. It’s our one stop bargain shop. And don’t let us go there without our kids, it’s like a staycation. We can walk those aisles for hours, conveniently bargaining with well placed bar code scanners. But we do more than walk don’t we? We go in for dinner and and with clear heads (this only happens without our kids), we leave with a newly decorated bedroom, bathroom and a complete outfit, accessories and  all. And we pat ourselves on the back and walk a few steps to the Starbucks rewarding ourselves with a latte for all the money we just saved. We, the parents, are singly responsible for Target’s success.

Overpopulation

We just keep having kids. We have friends that are pregnant and having kids, friends of friends that are doing the same. This cycle is never ending. We are overpopulating the world in which we live.  I have 3, and I love them, but don’t expect me to aid any further in the rise in population.

Minivans

Automatic doors, extra space for all our kids and all their junk, DVD players. It’s these amenities that we demand. The space they need from touching each other, and entertainment to force moments of silence. They give parents a much needed moment of peace. Yes parents, we are the reasons minivans exist. We have an overcrowding issue of minivans on the roadways, all showing  animated movies, with moms trying to keep their eyes on the road with one hand on the steering wheel and the other multi-tasking.  I have to say though, I don’t own a minivan. I choose to lug all my kids around in a gas guzzling. move your ass out of my way or you will get rammed SUV.

Water usage

We use so much water. I do my part by recycling, but before I toss the container I must rinse it with 20 gallons of water. Plus, we wash clothes EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. Mainly due to the loads we re-wash because we keep forgetting to put them in the dryer, but every day nonetheless.  But we don’t stop there. We opt for using gallons of water with the dishwasher, running it multiple times a day. Because let’s face it, no one has time to stand over dishes and wash them by hand.

Overfilling Landfills

When we’re not using the dishwasher, we bring out the paper products. I hold myself responsible for the amount of trash my family creates.  It started with paper plates, then paper cups. Now, the pantry is fully stocked with enough paper bowls, plates, cups, forks and spoons to come out of the zombie apocalypse without washing a single dish.

Yoga Pants

With our innovative ways to multi-task, and manage our time, it’s no wonder we single handedly thought to re-purpose the LBP (little black pant). They’re easy to slip on and off, no fuss wardbrobe and are so comfortable. They move with the body, and gives such flexibility.  It has now become a trend to wear them with no intentions of stepping foot in the gym. Walking into my kids school I know that Nike, Athleta, and Under Armour are making a killing in sales thanks to the SAHMs.

Oversized Purses

Remember the days of the fanny pack? Well those days are long gone. It started with stylish diaper bags and snow-balled from there. We’ve reshaped the fashion industry forcing designers to make it possible for moms to carry only one bag. Do you even remember the last time you saw a woman carrying around a Winnie the Pooh diaper bag? EXACTLY. Who needs a diaper bag when you have a suitcase on your arm with a billion compartments to hold diapers, makeup, snacks and whatever else our kids need.. This one is definitely our fault.

So yeah, we are PARTLY to blame for the world we’ve created. But let’s face it, we had help. So, the next time you lay eyes on a cute, loveable, huggable, tiny human, know that they were the catalyst for it all. Like always….BLAME THE KIDS.

 

Til Next Time,

 -C