I had my first child, a daughter, 11 years ago and it changed me. It was official, I was a parent. I obviously liked that feeling because I had two more over the course of 5 years. Right away I could tell I was transformed. Here are 20 clear signs you know you’re a parent:

  1. You enjoy chicken tenders and mac and cheese.
  2. Going to the store alone is considered a staycation.
  3. You lock yourself in the bathroom just to enjoy a shower and a pee with out an audience.
  4. You can host a cooking show for crock-pot and one pot meals for every occasion.
  5. You have revolutionized what it means to multi-task.
  6. You consider the best and most important milestone  is when they can open the refrigerator door independently.
  7. You eat special treats at night, so you don’t have to share.
  8. Your purse is the go to place for a snack.
  9. You’re ready to strangle the next stranger that looks at you and says “You’ve sure got your hands full”.
  10. You cringe at the sound of a snack package opening, because you are incredibly cheap and “THAT SNACK’S FOR SCHOOL”.  
  11. When people see you dressed up, they are over the top about how good you look…DANG do I look that bad on a normal day.
  12. Your closet is seperated into two sections. The larger section is the clothes you wear when you’re with your kids, and the smaller section is the clothes you wear when you’re not with your kids.
  13. You’re no longer capable of remembering someone’s real name.  They are just known as the parents of, or the mom/dad of…
  14. Instead of avoiding eye contact with the crazy mom with all the kids, you give her a special nod and smile with understanding. 
  15. You have super spidey senses, being able to hear and see EVERYTHING.
  16. You have completely memorized the songs to all the Disney movies, and you sing them, aloud, with feeling, when you’re alone.
  17. You secretly enjoy being sick, because the kids have to keep their distance.
  18. You sit down for a second to relax and get off your feet, and you awaken to a new day.
  19. You have perfected “the stare” to let your kids know you mean business.
  20. When your kids finally get to bed at the end of the day, you reward yourself with a beer or glass of wine to celebrate surviving another day.